Merry Chrismas Everyone!

That is a joke, writing this note to myself only as I have snuck away from the family activities for a moment to the computer. I am a little drunk already this morning. I know I'm not supposed to drink with this new medication, but it's ChRIstmas after all. I love my wife and my kids, and I love my job, I really do. But I love the Christmas break more than anything. And there is someone else I love, but I cannot talk about her here, not even here in my private journal, because it seems too dangerous! But I have to tell someone. It is driving me crazy. I am in love again, and I never thought that would happen! And I am happy for the first time in years. In years! Everyone can tell that I am happy and they are happy for me! But if they knew WHY I was happy, they would not be so happy. Happy happy happy happy is that all anyone cares about? It is all relative and fleeting anyway, and an illusion and a lie. But it's all we look for. The spiritual, ha! That is just another way of trying to find happiness.